A Birthday Remembrance

I went to Trader Joe's with my mom today and while my bill was something like $68.14, hers was only $19.86.

"Nineteen-eighty-six," the kind woman working the cash register said. "That was a good year!"

"It was," my mom agreed, and though she didn't elaborate, I knew she was referencing my brother, who was born on March 14, 1986.

This morning when I woke up, I was reflecting on the many gifts I gave my brother over the years. I am a gift giver. I really, really enjoy giving gifts to people I care about... which is why it's kind of funny to think about some of the birthday gifts I gave to Pip over the years.

One time, I gave him a blue can. I thought it was very cool. Useful? Not at all. But definitely cool. It was a can -- like a Campbell's Soup can -- with the lid pried partway off and then the whole thing was dipped in this shiny blue glaze. It was very artsy and only practical for storing something like pens. Pip thought it was one of the stupidest things ever. I have no idea where it is now, but I still to this day think it's cool.

Another time, I gave Pip some feet for his bed. I got them at IKEA and they made me laugh and when we were kids, our bed frames were metal and we were always stubbing our toes on them. Therefore, the orange, padded bird feet seemed like a generous offering: not only was I adding a hilarious component to his bedroom, I was also preventing future sore toes! Pip, however, was unimpressed... and, looking back on it, if I'm being completely honest, it was a very terrible gift.

The best birthday gift I ever gave to Pip was delivered in such a hilarious fashion (if I do say so myself). I strategized for weeks ahead of time. Possibly months ahead of time, because let's be honest: I love to plan things. Anyway. Let me share the tale...

Pip loved Ben Folds. I've never been a huge Ben Folds fan. There are a few songs of his that I like, such as "Army," but that's really the only one I can think of at the moment.

There was this one time that Phil and Brock and I saw Weezer and Ben Folds opened for him and I don't actually remember the Ben Folds part of the performance so I guess he was alright, but when Pip learned that I'd seen Ben Folds, he was kind of jealous. So for his birthday one year, I got him tickets to see Ben Folds with the Pittsburgh Symphony.

Right around the same time that I purchased these tickets, I got big into Dollar Shave Club. I'm someone who shaves her legs (and armpits, obviously) every single day. Until I discovered Dollar Shave Club, however, I was not someone who replaced her razor as often as she should. DSC changed that for me and introduced me to some fun shower products. Because I wanted to smell all the smells, but didn't necessarily need all the products, I purchased an assortment of shampoo, conditioner, and body wash for Pip. I put these in a box, hid the Ben Folds tickets underneath the manly-scented products, and set about building anticipation.

At least every other week, but usually more like every week, Pip and I would have a solid three-hour phone conversation. We talked about all the things most siblings talk about... along with all the things most siblings never broach. He was my best friend; he knew everything about me. My coworker Baustie once told me, "Hannah, you and your brother have a sibling relationship like none I've ever witnessed before." I liked that observation. I still do.

In the weeks leading up to Pip's birthday, I'd periodically mention how excited I was to give him his present. He'd guess at what it might be and I never gave anything away (even though I giggled incessantly about the very fun secret I was keeping).

When it finally came time to deliver the gift, I was incapable of holding still. I was dancing around my kitchen and laughing and just generally squirmy... and then Pip opened the box and found shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. And folks? I lost it. I mean, his face was awash with disgruntled disbelief. "You got me soap?" he said, utterly unimpressed. "Soap?"

I told him to lift up the tissue paper.

He did.

That's when the gift became The Gift of Gifts. If Pip were here today, I think he'd likely choose those Ben Folds tickets as his best birthday gift (given by his sister, anyway). Unfortunately, Pip isn't here today. And unfortunately, I no longer have the joy of purchasing gifts for him every March. But the thing I do have is the memories.

Thank goodness for the memories.